Think Before You Speak

I've seen the above image or one quite similar to it on pinterest all over the place for about as long as I've been using the site. The concept of thinking before you speak isn't something new, it was something my mother tried to hammer into my brain from the moment I was born. I can't imagine that I am alone in this.

When we first got engaged everyone's first question was "did you set a date yet". Honestly, it's none of their business but most people don't know what to say after congratulations and it's somehow become socially acceptable to pry for the sake of small talk.

 I this case I find the habit more annoying than offensive but that's just me. 

However, once you get married this somehow makes it alright for people to pry even further and in this instance I do find it offensive.

"So when are you having kids?" Is without a doubt the question I've gotten the most since married, I tried to keep track how many times I've been asked but I lost count around 534.

I don't know when it became alright to discuss such a private matter but it needs to stop.

"So when are you having kids?"  - What a loaded question. 

Asked to me by people I barely know, some I would hardly consider acquaintances. 

I understand that most people don't mean any harm by asking this question. They might not even actually be curious, just making conversation.

But just think for one minute, how would you feel during this conversation?

You: "So when are you having kids?"
Other person: "What makes you think that I can?"

Think about that next time you're just trying to make small talk.

The National Infertility Association 

Pumpkin Palooza!

Fall is here which means you can't turn around without bumping into something that is pumpkin flavored. So here I am to add to that with a recipe I tried for the very first time this week.

Fun fact: It is nearly impossible for me to type the word pumpkin correctly the first time it always comes out punkin, possibly because that's what my dad calls me. 

These are also completely edible and super tasty as muffins. 

(you know, without the frosting)

What you need for the cupcakes:

2 1/4 cups unbleached all-purpose flour

1 tsp ground cinnamon

1 tsp ground nutmeg

1 tsp ground ginger

1 tsp ground allspice

1 Tbsp baking powder

1/2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp salt

1/2 cup canola oil

1 cup granulated sugar

1/3 cup brown sugar, loosely packed

2 eggs

3/4 cup milk

1 (15-oz.) can pure pumpkin puree (not pumpkin pie mix)

What you'll need for the Cinnamon Cream Cheese Frosting:

1 packages cream cheese (regular or light), softened

1/4 cup (1/2 stick) butter, softened

3 1/2 to 4 cups confectioner’s sugar

1 tsp vanilla

1 tsp ground cinnamon

How to make pumpkin cupcakes:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Line muffin pans.
I used one 12 piece regular muffin pan and one 6 piece large muffin pan. 

In medium bowl, blend the flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, allspice, baking powder, baking soda, & salt. Set aside.

In large bowl, blend canola oil, granulated sugar, and brown sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs one at a time, blending well after each addition. Stir in the milk and pumpkin puree and blend well. Add the flour mixture into this pumpkin mixture and stir until blended. Pour batter into muffin cups, filling each cup about 2/3 full.

Bake at 350 degrees for 17-25 minutes depending on the size of your cupcakes, or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool cupcakes in pans for about 5 minutes, then remove to completely cool on a wire rack.

You can make the frosting while cupcakes are cooling…

How to make the cinnamon cream cheese frosting:

Blend softened cream cheese and butter together until smooth. Add in vanilla and cinnamon, blending everything well. Gradually add confectioner’s sugar a cup at a time, blending mixture after each addition.

Frost cupcakes when they have completely cooled. Seriously, if you do it too early it's a drippy mess.

Also, because of the cream cheese these should be refrigerated if you're saving them.

 In my opinion they actually tasted much better the next day. 

The Beef thought they were fantastic from the get go. 

Who Are You People?!

So just for shits and giggles I decided to browse some of the stats for this blog. It's not normally something I pay attention to or even care about but I'm glad I looked because I found a few interesting things.

Approximately 34% of my pageviews come from outside of the United States, with the largest amount coming from Russia. I am fascinated by this and while I'm not sure how you found me I would like to say Здравствуйте! Как поживаете? Don't get too excited though, aside from собака that's all I've retained from a Russian language/history course I took in high school.

A whopping 40% of my pageviews come from people who are using Internet Explorer.  Now, if you'd asked me I would say that I didn't know a single person who still used IE (I even upgraded my mom to Chrome) so I'm quite confused. Am I friends with closet IE users? Also, if you happen to be someone who is currently using IE, can you please explain why?

71% of my pageviews come from windows operating systems which wasn't surprising to me even though I'm futsin' with a Mac these days. What was surprising however was that under the operating systems list I found out that people are indeed viewing from their droid, iphones and in 56 cases, a blackberry. Who is viewing blogs on a blackberry? There were also a few ipad instances which is a new category for my blog viewers and 43 views from an ipod which completely blows my mind because I can't imagine using my ipod to read my own blog, let alone someone elses.

If you fall into any of these categories feel free to speak up, I'd love to hear from you.

And then came the search terms that led people stumble upon the blog. The most popular has been anything related to the NY Football Giants though I somehow don't see that number growing this season. All things pertaining to Notre Dame football also seem to lead people this way. However, it was the phrase "famous squirrels" that gave me the biggest chuckle off of the search terms list.

I'd also like to apologize to whomever it was that found their way here by searching for "spank buttons" I'm sure this was a colossal disappointment.

As far as referring sites go facebook and blogs that belong to my friends are riding high the list. Google also seems to be a big fan which I'm not surprised about because does anyone really use yahoo or bing these days?





And for whatever reason this is my most viewed post.

So basically, I don't know how you found me or why you're here or why you even keep coming back but if you've found something fun or entertaining I'm glad.

Wedding DIY

Now updated with pro pictures. 

On July 30, 2013 at exactly 4pm I started a thread called "I made this today" and began posting all the projects I completed for the wedding on August 18, 2013 at 10:38pm I completed my postings.

What happened in between has been referred to has "craftapalozza" and "the craftpolcypse" and I can't say I find either of those descriptions inaccurate.

 The following is my account to the best of my recollection of what transpired and was created during those 20 days.

For these I took an approximately 6" wide roll of burlap I was lucky enough to find in the sales bin outside of Michael's and just cut it diagonally to make the triangles. I used white acrylic paint and a stencil I found for the letters and then hot glued the triangles to a length of twine to string them together. They held up fantastically.

Then I started to make flowers. I used an old dictionary that my grandparents gave me. I ended up with approximately 110 of these blooms. I used a similar technique to the one found here. Then I took a length of floral wire, folded it in half and wound it around itself to act as the stem which was hot glued to the bloom. This resulted in one hell of a cigar butt sized burn on my shin that is still there as a reminder that hot glue and sleep deprivation do not mix. 

The flowers ended up being used for my bouquet and centerpieces. For the center pieces I put floral foam in the bottom of cans I'd been saving and had wrapped in good grained scrapbook paper and doodled on with colored pencils. Then I just stuck the stems into the foam and arranged the flowers accordingly. 

For my bouquet I ended up wrapping the stems in floral paper and then in this wired ribbon. I added a bow for more flair and then photo charms carrying pictures of my grandparents, grandfathers on one side, grandmothers on the reverse. This was a touch that my family really appreciated.

One of my favorite things to do at a wedding is the clink my glass like crazy to get the bride and groom to kiss. Since we weren't having glass at the wedding I decided on this solution. I purchased some cheap little bells on amazon and used my cricut to cut out letters in vinyl that I attached to the bells. These also became part of the centerpiece. 

We had a Christmas party during our first year of dating and the most fun was had outside where we set up a backdrop for people to take photos in front of that included props. It was something we really wanted to include again. We built a frame out of PVC pipe that was 10' long and 7' high and from it we hung this fabric with more burlap banner. Notice how you can see the polkadots through the burlap? This made the letters nearly invisible once the structure was upright so I needed to create a backing for the triangles. Thankfully my mother for no reason we can come up with has a gigantic roll of tan felt that was absolutely perfect for the job.

Somewhere I along the line I saw a picture on pinterest that inspired this hefty project. I'm proud to say it was completed in in about 10 hours. And when I say completed I mean that my friends husband and I went into the woods, sliced up a tree, brought it home tried a few methods of sanding (didn't use any of them), creating a stencil, tracing every design with a pencil on the wood, actually going out and having to purchase a new wood burner and finally burning 8 of these bad boys after much trial and error on the practice slab to perfect my technique. 

After the addition of a lantern which provided light and bug protection (I put citronella oil in it to burn) the centerpieces were complete and just as perfect as I'd imagined them to be.

Next came the cake topper which was created using string instead of twine because on such a small scale where draping is of the utmost importance twine does not play nice. Hot glue was also used in the this project though no injuries occurred. I also used a sharpie for the letters.

I couldn't stand having all those leftover flags and string just lying around so I put them to good use on these tiny mason jars my mother in law sent up as a last minute decoration idea. They actually turned out to be very charming and a much welcomed addition to our buffet tables.

And finally, in the background you can see the flags that inspired the above two projects. They were made using this method and currently this is probably the best picture I have of them. You can all see me asking for a substitute groom as mine had disappeared when it was time to cut the cake.

And finally, what is more fun than a personalized mad libs? The responses we got were HYSTERICAL. I looked around online and found a couple of examples and frankensteined them together to make this. Then I painstakingly type it all out into the same template we used for our wedding invites on vistaprint. It took forever but it was well worth it.

So there you go, the absolutely madness that was my wedding DIY 

adventure. 

What's in a name?

Well you can still call me Button, I clearly have no issue with this. In real life though after I got married I wanted to change my name. I know this can be a hot topic for some people but for me it was a no brainer. I always expected that my last name would be different one day and to be honest I was pretty excited about it. 

This is not because I was dying to shed my family name or I wanted to feel like I belonged to someone else. It's far more shallow than that. My maiden name was four syllables and I can count on one hand the amount of people who pronounced it correctly on the first try. 

The Beef on the other hand came with a last name that only has two syllables and even though it is often mispelled it is never mispronounced. I'll take that trade off any day. 

I surely would have been in a hell of a pickle if he'd had a name more complicated than I did. However, looking back in my dating history at the last names of my partners aside from one crazy Polish exception (the last name, not the guy) you can find a James, Jones, Smith & Stevens. My subconscious was totally looking out for me. 

Changing my name in the real world wasn't too difficult. Social security turned out to be quick and easy but I suspect that was just good timing on my part as I walked into an empty office and walked out to see 15 people waiting. 

My second stop was DMV where I had similar luck in that it was nearly empty when I arrived and a bus possibly let out right behind me. However, they weren't much help to me because apparently you need to hit up SS and DMV with 48 hours in between. 

Who doesn't love going to the DMV twice in one week? My second trip was much more successful in that I left with a new drivers license but not successful in that I sat there forever furiously tweeting and instagramming my excruciating boredness. 

Changing my name at work was a breeze and I was met with more congratulations from coworkers that I don't really know which always makes me awkward, I can only hope they don't take it personally.

When it came time to change my name on my bank accounts I had to stumble through more congratulations from strangers, several attempts to sell me new credit cards and finally the first time I ever needed to sign my new name.

My old signature was a perfect mess, unreadable but sleek and slightly dangerous looking. I could execute it in a second and it was uniquely me. I never doodled my new name while day dreaming, I wish I would have. It might have saved me the embarrassment of stopping halfway through my signature and freezing like a deer in headlights. Eventually I mumbled that I should have practiced this and then finishing my signature with a result that looked like something a toddler did with their foot. 

Next came my credit cards which was weird because I had to do it on the phone and listen to someone in a far away call center congratulate me on behave of their company on my new marriage over and over again. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm hyped to be Mrs. The Beef but strangers being pumped about it strikes me as creepy and or disingenuine. Also, I'm socially awkward so what do I know?

The biggest challenge came from changing my "internet name". This is funny because I didn't need to, it's just the internet, my usernames have no bearing over anything. However, since I made the decision some time ago to base my internet name off of my real name I thought it would be appropriate to change it to reflect my new last name.

My maiden name started with a C which translated into See on the internet, this is something I did without thought one day. My married name starts with a T which I could spell Tee or Tea. Unwilling to decide I took a vote, I asked for opinions in several forums and was surprised by input. Did I want to be a beverage or an article of clothing? I didn't see the importance since I don't ever plan on branding myself but it did bring up some amusing mental images.

The winner was Tea which is odd because I don't really even like tea. I also felt that changing only one letter in my internet last name was kind of a gip, so if i had been Button Sea I would probably now be Button Tee. 

By the way, what is the over under on how long it's going to take me to stop giggling like a pixie stick fueled 9 years old whenever I hear my new name?

What I've been holding back.

On August 24, 2013 The Beef and I did in fact get married without a hitch.

On September 6, 2013 we went on our honeymoon.

I haven't mentioned ANY of this on the blog yet!

But why?

Honestly, I have two very valid reasons.

1) I really needed a wedding detox.

2) I wanted to update with pictures and I don't have the professional ones back yet 

(but I've seen some of them and they are AMAZING)

I promise though that you'll get both stories eventually, I'll start with the honeymoon because that's the part I was most looking forward to anyway and I do have all the pictures from that adventure.

I also promise that I will post about all the DIY stuff I did for the wedding. My original intention was to post about it while I was doing it but I feel like once you see how much I did in the time span of three months while working 50hrs a week you'll understand that it wasn't feasible.

So big things are coming this way and on top of that fall is here which always means more adventures. :D

I'm still here.

I'm working on getting this blog going again but today I have something really important that I wanted to talk about.

Suicide takes the lives of nearly 30,000 Americans every year.

Many who attempt suicide never seek professional care.

Over half of all suicides occur in adult men, ages 25-65.

For young people 15-24 years old, suicide is the third leading cause of death.

There are an estimated 8 to 25 attempted suicides to 1 completion.

Suicide is the 11th leading cause of death in the U.S. (homicide is 15th). (CDC)

It is estimated that there are at least 4.5 million survivors in this country. (AAS)

International Suicide Prevention

I am someone who on several occasions felt that suicide might be the only way out. 

I am someone who has lost a loved one to suicide.
I can attest that the pain and confusion are at times still very fresh and raw from exactly 12 years ago today. 

I can remember all too well the feelings of helplessness and despair.

I have no words for how highly I recommend seeking help by reaching out to someone.

The world is full of resources and people who actually want to help you.

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

I can personally and highly attest to the talents of the wonderful people who work at The Samaritans  even now when I'm a little bit stressed out I can shoot them an email to try to sort things out. As someone who despises talking on the phone (especially to strangers) this is a priceless resource.

Here's something from the comments section from the video that hits home:

When you ask students "what words do you hear used to describe some one with a mental health challenge?" They say: CRAZY, NUTS, SCIZO, WEIRD, PYSCHO...When you ask them what words do you heard used to describe someone with Cancer, Diabetes, or any physical disability...They say: Sick.....Why do people need to see it to have empathy?

The stigma needs to go.

I'm here if you need to talk.